Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

Everybody loves Indiana Jones. With a mix of quick action, memorable characters, and practical effects that will haunt your nightmares you can bet it was popular. After the success of The Last Crusade it was only logical to make a fourth movie..... A rough 19 years later. As you may have guessed I am talking about Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. It's one tranwreck of a movie and I have to review it. Small note there will be some spoilers..... But let's be fair this movie is ruined either way. So without further ado let's get started.










Characters: The main character of this movie is Indiana Jones. He's mostly the same as in the previous movies.... Just older. But don't worry he has an obvious stunt double for the action sequences. The other characters in this movie are Indiana Jones' son he really doesn't do much. Marian from the first movie. She's kind of there for the throwback to the first movie. There's Mac.... He's pointless end of story. There's this crazy guy.... He's only there as a convenient plot device. Finally there's the main villain: a Russian lady with a really over the top accent. She's probably the best part of the movie just with how over the top she is.







Special Effects: The effects in this movie are pretty fake looking. I never once believe that there were gophers, monkeys, or man eating ants in this movie. Some of the stunts are impressive but like said above it's pretty obvious when they're using a stunt double. It's sad that the special effects of a movie in the 90's like Jurassic Park are better than this one.











Plot: Okay so Indiana Jones is returning the skull of an alien to it's resting place...... What? That's the story? When where aliens part of the Indiana Jones series. It's about as silly as it sounds. They spend a lot of time explaining stuff. Seriously, during one exposition scene I got a glass of water and when I got back they were still explaining the plot. It's a very silly premise and doesn't really fit into the universe of Indiana Jones.









Overall Kingdom of the Crystal Skull is a laughably bad movie. So if you want a movie with bad effects a silly plot and russians

Goosebumps: The Movie

Happy Halloween...... Make that November. As some of you may remember I reviewed a few episodes of the Goosebumps TV show from the 90's. But apparently they made a movie out it. So is it as average as the show or will it actually be better? Let's find out.













Characters: Let's take a look at our main characters. There's Zach. He's bland end of story. There Hannah. She's the generic love interest end of story. There's Zach's Mother. She's barely in the movie.There's Zach's Aunt. She's also barely in the movie. There are these two cops who are barely in the movie but are actually pretty funny. And there's R.L. Stine as portrayed by Jack Black. Honestly he's my favourite characters because of how over the top he is. There are also the various villains from the books. But the only one to get a decent amount of screen time is Slappy the living dummy. Overall there are some pretty forgettable characters but the memorable ones make up for it.

Special Effects: It's a mixed bag. Some of the practical effects like the zombies are pretty convincing. But when they use CGI for monsters like the Yeti, werewolf, and the evil Gnomes I never believed that they were actually there. Overall the special effects are just okay.










Plot: The plot to this movie is a strange hybrid of Jumanji and Gremlins. I like both those movies so this one is pretty good. However I couldn't keep drawing comparisons like the monsters cutting the power and so on. There's also a romance plot with bland and blander..... I mean Zach and Hannah. As you may have guessed from my sarcasm this is my least favourite parts of the movie. But the memorable parts of the movie make up for it.







Conclusion: Overall this wasn't  bad. But with the uninteresting leads and unconvincing effects it's only okay. But some of the practical effects are nice and Jack Black as R. L. Stine sort of steals the show for me. So I do recommend this movie as a Halloween movie.... Even though Halloween is now over.

Top Ten Creepy Characters

In honour of the fact that Halloween is coming soon I thought I would do a top ten list. I will be listing characters from TV and movies that I find the most creepy. This is all opinion based so your favourite character may not be here. Let's get started.






10 Marik from Yu-Gi-Oh
I haven't watched this show in a while but from what I can remember it's about as much fun as watching someone play a card game. The reason Marik is so low is because I can't remember much about him. I put him up here mostly based on his appearance. Seriously what is wrong with his face?







9 Manbat from Batman the Animated Series
Batman the Animated Series is a great version of the Batman character. But seriously look at this guy. He is terrifying. I will not be able to sleep for weeks now. And his transformation scene where he becomes Manbat isn't very fun to watch.









8 The Pottsfielders from Over the Garden Wall
Over the Garden Wall is a great TV miniseries. In the second episode the main characters find a town called Pottsfield. It seems pretty normal except for the fact that all the people there are skeletons wearing pumpkins. They all look so uncanny and the leader pumpkin has a really creepy voice. However the reason their so low is that they don't do anything that evil.







7 Puppet King from Teen Titans
I love puppets. Okay, that's a lie. Puppets are freaky. I mostly have the Twilight Zone  to thank for that. And a Puppet that turns people into puppets is supper creepy. We never find out what Puppet King is and they never appear again after that making them all the more creepy.









6 The Summerween Trickster from Gravity Falls
I  hope your in the Halloween spirit. Because if your not your gonna get eaten by a freaky ghost thing. Everything from his character design to his voice is just plain creepy. Also throughout the episode his design becomes more deformed and creepy. Yay fun for the whole family.







5 Sabrina from Pokémon
Ah Pokémon, a world a wonder and adventure.... and crazy ladies with psychic powers who turn people into dolls. Sabrina would be creepy enough on her own but she also has miniature doll of herself. Also, fun fact. The episode she is featured in is the first episode of the show I saw.... Great way to start off.









4 This Guy from the Adventures of Mark Twain
You know that scene from Dumbo with the pink elephants? Imagine that only a million times more freaky. And like the elephants this guy never shows up again. Fun fact the scene he is featured in is actually cut from some TV broadcastings of the movie. It's that terrifying.






3 Giffanny from Gravity Falls
Gravity Falls makes a second appearance on the list. This time for a character that everything they do is just disturbing. Even before they do anything evil their just unnerving. Also towards the end of the episode they posses some animatronics at a Chuck E Cheese knock off. So congrats Gravity Falls you have made me afraid of Anime and Chuck E Cheese.





2 The Beast from Over the Garden Wall
Speaking of shows making a return Over the Garden Wall is on this list again. Who is the beast? What is the beast? What do they look like? You never know and that is what makes them scary for me. It's the mystery aspect.







1 The Other Mother from Coraline
I know I've mention them before but seriously they are scary. Even before she transforms into a spider monster there is just something unsettling about them. You really have to watch the movie to see for yourself. But I think they are one of the creepiest characters in fiction. Happy Halloween.

Hotel Transylvania

It's time for another review. And this time it's in a new format. The movie I am reviewing is Hotel Transylvania. Seems like good timing since the sequel is coming out soon. Small side note there will be some spoilers in the "Plot" section of the review. Let's get started.

Characters: The main characters are Dracula, his daughter Mavis, and Jonathan the human. Dracula is basically every over protective dad character ever. But he is kind of funny. Mavis is sort of boring but they aren't terrible. And Jonathan is actually really annoying and totally X-Treme..... With an X for some reason. The side characters like the the Wolfman, Frankenstein, the hotel workers and the hotel guests are actually pretty funny. Jonathan sort of kills the movie for me. But the other characters are pretty good.

Animation: The animation is the best part of the movie for me. Every character stands out and some of the backgrounds have cool details in it. I also like some of the chase scenes in the movie. Of course the animation might me a bit too cartoonish for some people but personally I really like it. So in my opinion this is one of the aspects of the movie.









Music: There are several songs in this movie and I didn't like any of them. The first one felt like it was written ten minuets before recording. The second one had some very painful product placement for Doritos. The one after that was just mindless shouting that I couldn't even understand. And the last one was the worst pop song I have ever heard in a movie. So if your watching this on DVD you might want to skip the songs.

Plot: The first half of the movie is pretty good. We see how the hotel works and that is actually pretty cool. The plot actually starts when Jonathan enters and he and Mavis fall in love. I get annoyed by Jonathan but it's okay so far. But in final act of the movie is where things get really cliché. We have Jonathan leaving but then he comes back....Gee, didn't see that coming. And towards the end they say the word "Zing" a million times and now I never want to hear that word again. So overall the first two halves of the movie are better than the last





Final thoughts: For me Hotel Transylvania is a very mixed bag. Some jokes work but some are just forced. Some characters I like but others are really bad. The animation great.. Would I watch it again? Probably. Will I go see the sequel? Yes. In the end Hotel Transylvania isn't a bad movie.... But it isn't great either. So I half recommended. This has been another instalment of Keaton on Films.

We Bare Bears

Sorry for the large gap between posts. I'vead a busy summer. Anyway onto what I'm reviewing today. We Bare Bears is an interesting show about three bears trying to fit in with the humans. Seems like an interesting idea. I will be reviewing the first three episodes. Lets see if its as good as it sounds or if it bearly lives up to expectations..... I apologise for the terrible pun.











Our Stuff: In this first episodes the tree main bears, Grizzly, Panda, and Ice Bear, find out that their backpack has gone missing after playing a game of basket ball. The rest of the episode is the three bears looking for their stuff. Their interactions with the humans are pretty humorous and it does a good job establishing the characters. In the end it turns out that the person they thought stole their backpack didn't actually steal it. In most  bad kids shows the characters would never realize they made this mistake. But here the bears realize what they did which is a nice touch. Overall this is a good way to start.





Viral Video: The plot to this episode is that after Grizzly sees a video of a koala named Nom-Nom he wants to become "Internet Famous". A lot of the jokes really work and the video the bears film is actually really funny. Nom-Nom is actually a really good character but I kept being distracted because of his voice which sounded very familiar to me and I couldn't figure out where it came from.  Overall it is a good follow up.






Food Truck: In this episode after the three bears gets some bad food from a food truck. Grizzly convinces them to open their own food truck that sells calzones. After nobody buys their food they start selling it to animals and things go bad quick. Just like in the first episode the bears see the fault in their actions and try to make things better. I like the episode and out of the three this ones is definitely my personal favourite.




Overall We Bare Bears is a very creative show and I hope to see more of it in the future. The characters are very memorable and the plots are funny. So I definetly recommend We Bare Bears as a fun comedy show. Plus it has a really awesome theme song.

Goosebumps Part II

Last Halloween I reviewed the 90's television series Goosebumps. The series was based on a series of scary children's books of the same name. It was supposed to be like The Twilight Zone for kids. I only reviewed three of the series episodes and I am back for more. I will be reviewing. So let's see if I'm in for a scare or if it's not as scary as it may seem.


You Can't Scare Me: First episode on the list is  You Can't Scare Me. The episode starts with two people out in the swamp but then they both are attacked by monster made out of mud. But this scene only turns out to be a report on local legends being given by a girl name Courtney. Two of the other kids in the school Eddie and Hat (yes Hat is the only name we get for him) don't seem to like Courtney because she is very stuck up and thinks she is better than everyone else. So Eddie and Hat decide to pull a prank on her by putting a snake in her lunch bag. This only ends up scaring her friends and Courtney just puts the snake outside. They try something to scare her again by dropping a spider on her head but that doesn't work either. They decide to try one last time by pretending to be mud monsters in the bog. After inviting her out to the bog they over themselves in mud and try and scare her she realizes it's them and lectures them. But then a real mud monster comes out of the bog but Courtney isn't afraid of it either and she ends up lecturing it until it dries up from being in the sun for too long. Okay, I will admit that was really funny. Courtney gets lots of local media coverage for discovering the monster and Eddie and Hat wander off to and sit on the bench. But then after they sit down they notice another mud monster behind them. The End....or is it?





This episode was pretty average. Courtney was an annoying character but so were Eddie and Hat so there aren't too many likeable characters. However the ending was hilarious and it makes up for having to sit through what otherwise is a very dull episode.

The Scarecrow Walks at Midnight: Two kids go to visit their grandparents who live on a farm. Their grandparents have a really weird farm hand name Stanley who is always raving about how the scarecrows in the field are alive. Nobody believes him of course and the kids get on with the vacation. The next day the kids are out playing catch when the ball is throw out into the corn field but when they go get it a scarecrow attacks them. But then it turns out it's just a kid named Sticks playing a prank on them. That night Stanley keeps going on about how the scarecrows in the field are alive but everyone ignores him. The next day a scare crow comes out of the field and falls on top of one of the kids. They assume Sticks is at it again and that night prepare to scare him back. But that night they see one of the scarecrows walking and Sticks explains that Stanley brought them to life to do farm work for him but now their out of control. They manage to shread the scarecrows into little pieces using the thresher but the next day the thresher is alive. The End....or is it?





This episode was pretty good. The acting ranged from okay to weird and there were a lot of awkward pauses. The make up was actually really good and their were some scarty moments. All and all a pretty decent episode.

Shocker on Shock Street: A girl named Erin and her friend Marty are at Erin's dads work shop. He works as a special effects designer for horror movies. Most notably a series of movies called the Shock Street Saga. Erin's father meets them and says that he is working on a horror themed ride for the local amusement park and he wants Erin and Marty to test it. They get on the ride but about halfway through it gets stuck and they get out and walk around. They find them selves on the set to of Shock Street from the movies but end up running into a lot of monsters which it turns out are not special effects but rather real monsters. Meanwhile the father and his assistants are trying to find them. They eventually find them but it turns out that the kids aren't humans but really.............Robots that their father used to test the rides at the park.......I won't question it. Later in the fathers lab he is seen building two new robots but the old ones reactivate to take revenge on him, The End......or is it?




This episode......was really weird. Not only does the twist make zero sense but not much happens for most of the episode. Most of the episode is just the two kids walking around the park. Not too much to say about this epsiode but, What?


And that was my second review of the Goosebumps TV show. If you want to hear more about what I thinl about it go check out mu first review I did last Halloween. Until next time this has been Keaton on Films.

Top Ten Kids Shows that Jumped the Shark

Jumping the shark is somthing that happens to a TV show when the writers are out of ideas and just decide to do whatever pops into their head. But it's something that happens to kids shows too. So I'll be counting down those moments right here. So strap on your water skis bewcause this is the Top Ten TV Shows that Jumped the Shark. Also some spoilers for some of these shows are ahead so be warned.



10 The Muppet Show: The Star Wars Episode
Everyone loves the Muppets almost everyone had them in their childhood. The catchy songs, the funny characters, and the guest stars that modern kids won't recognize. But, believe it or not there was an episode of the iconic Muppet Show that featured the characters from Star Wars. The episode isn't that bad, it's just that it feels really out of place in this world. Not too much else to say about except for: "Why and how?"







9 Batman the Animated Series: The Redesign
Halfway into this series the animation was redesigned to look more stylized. For some of it the redesign worked. But for other parts it didn't work as well. One of the biggest examples is the joker who.....I don't know it just seems really weird. Of course this didn't stop the series from being any less good.












                                                                                    8 Ninja Turtles: The Alien
In the 2003 reboot of the 80's show about teenaged reptiles that ate pizza and fought crime (it is much better than it sounds) we get a pretty silly dramatic reveal. At the beginging of season two we find out that the series' main villain, a samurai called The Shredder is an alien. While the reveal actually does make a lot of sense and is pretty schocking it still doesn't make this moment any less silly.







                                                                                    7 Total Drama: Feral Zeke

While this show was aimed at teenagers it did air on Cartoon Network so I guess this counts. The show is a parody of reality TV shows such as Survivor and The Amazing Race. One of the least interesting characters in the show is the reason they jumped the shark believe it or not. In season three the character Zeke (who didn't have much of persoanlity becides a thick Canadian accent) got turned into what is essentialy Gollum from Lord of the Rings after being locked in the cargo hold of a jumbo jet. Honestly, I don't know why they did this. He barely shows up later on and doesn't add much to the plot.

6 Hanna Barbera: Repeating Themselves

In the 70's the animation studio Hanna Barbera was running out of ideas. One of their biggest hits was Scooby Doo. They realized is was popular and easy to make seeing as all the episodes basically have the same plot of old guys dressed as ghosts. So they decided to make cheap knock offs of it. Some of the best examples of this are the shows The Funky Phantom and Goober and the Ghost Chasers. Their wasn't much difference between any of these shows just change the names of the characters and then you have your show. In fact one episode of Ghost Chasers had a plot simaller to a Scooby Doo episode.



5 Any Show: The Clip Show
If the writers for a TV show won't finish their script before their deadline they will throw together a clip show. Just edit clips from older episodes together maybe write a flimsy plot to hold it together and then you have your clip show. Clip shows are rarely ever good. Scratch that clip shows are never good their always either "Meh"  or "No".



4 Scooby Doo: Guest Stars
I am not going to be nice to Hanna Barbera in this review, am I? The season of scooby doo titled "The New Scooby Doo Movies" had a gimmick where each episode had a special guest star. Now, the episodes are pretty average for Scooby Doo the problem is it makes the episodes feel really dated. Most kids these days won't recognise Don Knotts, Davy Jones, or Phyllis Diller. Probably one of the weirder episodes of the show is where they team up with the Adam West Burt Ward Batman and Robin to stop the Joker and the Penguin.




3 The Flintstones: The Great Gazoo
For those of you who don't know who this is allow me to explain, The Great Gazoo is a tiny, green, floating alien who was exiled to Earth. Okay, stop. This is a sitcom about the stone age. Where do aliens fit into this? Not only is it out of place but Gazoo is also very annoying.








2 Scooby Doo Again: Scrappy Doo
Scooby's nephew Scrappy will forever be known as one of the most annoying cartoon characters in history. All he did was shout catchphrases and got in trouble. To make things first worse his voice really started to hurt your ears after a while. Honestly, what where they thinking? There isn't much to say that hasn't been said already. Let's just hope they don't bring him back any time soon.




1 Happy Days: Fonzie Jumps the Shark
Well gee....I bet you didn't expect this one did you? Well of course it's on here what kind of Shark Jumping list wouldn't it be without it. It's pretty self explainetory The Fonz jumps over some sharks on water skis. It is just about as silly as it sounds. It's the original Shark Jumping moment what else can you say.










Well that was the Top Ten Kids Shows that Jumped the Shark. I do suppose that Happy Days is more of a family show but still what kind of a reviewer would I be if I didn't include it. I hope you enjoyed it and I will see you next time for another review.