Escape from the Planet of the Apes

Well I have good new and I have bad news. The good news is those aliens let me go. The bad news is they planted a bomb in my head and they will  activate it if I don't review all the Planet of the Apes movies by the end of 2015. Now keep in mind like every time I review a sequel there will be spoilers for the first two films. I haven't even started the movie and I already have a problem with this movie. If you remember the last movie ended with the planet exploding. So there is no way for a sequel to happen because none of the original characters are in it  nor can it even take place on The Planet of the Apes. But enough complaining let's start my review of Escape from the Planet of the Apes.




The year is 1973 the American government discovers a spaceship off the cost of California. Inside the ship are three apes Dr. Cornelius (Roddy McDowall), Dr. Zira (Kim Hunter), and Dr. Milo (Sal Mineo). The apes choose not to talk and are taken to the zoo. At this time I would like to point out how incredibly convenient it is for all of these apes to be testing a spaceship just as the planet blew up and it isn't explained how they manged to fix the spaceship since the last time we saw it it was at the bottom of a lake. In the zoo the scientists give them some basic tests but then one of scientists offends Zira and this causes her to talk. The scientists go into the other room to discuss this revelation. But the gorilla in the next cage over chokes Dr. Milo so Milo is taken away. A man named Dr. Lewis Dixon (Bradford Dillman) decides to get them to hold a conference where they will answer any questions about where they came from and who they are.


At the conference they say that they come from the future and that there is a war. The world seems to like these apes except for one man named Dr. Hasslein who fears the apes. The apes are pretty much become celebrities: they go shopping for clothes, ride in limos, and do other things celebrities do. OK I'm just going to stop the movie there and acknowledge what a drastic change of tone this is from the first movie. I mean we go from a man being stranded on distant planet where apes rule to a sitcom. This isn't Escape from the Planet of the Apes it's Vacation from the Planet of the Apes. Zira tours a history museum when all of a sudden Zira realizes she is pregnant. Wait was this a sub plot in the first two movies you may be wondering....well the answer is no they just made it up for this movie. So Dr. Hasslein gets Zira drunk and she tells him that in the future the world is destroyed and apes rule the world. With this information Dr. Hasslein gets permission to interrogate them.

***SPOILER ALERT STOP HERE IF YOU DON'T WANT THE END RUINED***

Zira and Cornelius  tell Hasslein that a plague wiped out all cats and dogs and the humans replaced them with Apes. But the apes revolted against the humans and enslaved humans. Hasslien gets enough information out of Zira and he convinces the government to kill the Apes. Zira and Cornelius try to escape qnd find Dr. Dixon from before who helps them escape to a circus where a man named Armondo (Ricardo Montalban) helps them meanwhile we cut to Dr. Hasslein trying to find the apes but he can't seem to find them anywhere. We cut back to the Aoes where we see that Zira gave birth to a baby chimp named Milo. They all leave the circus and find a place to hide at an oil rig. The next day Dr. Hasslein catches up with Cornelius and Zira. He then kills Cornelius and Zira but not before Cornelius shoots Hasslein. Wow this is a very big change of tone from the rest of the movie I mean it's like in the middle of an episode of Scooby-Doo; it turns out that it isn't a guy in a costume for once. Sorry back to the movie. But it turns out that Zira switched Milo with a baby chimp at the circus thus perfectly setting up the next sequel. The End.

***SPOILER ALERT STOP HERE IF YOU DON'T WANT THE END RUINED***

This movie isn't all that great. It isn't as bad as Beneath the Planet of the Apes but it isn't that great either. The humor (even though some of its funny) feel really out of place Dr. Milo at beginning seems to be a bit of a pointless character and the sudden change of tone at the end felt a bit odd. Most of the movie is just Zira and Cornelius comically interacting with the humans. Also the Dr. Hasslein isn't that much of an interesting villain. All I have to say is...please just stick to the first movie.